Self-Abuse

What does self-abuse mean?  When you first hear the term, it sounds like when someone inflicts pain on themselves, like cutting.  No, I haven't done anything like that—this is how the Church is now referring to masturbation.

That's right, the LDS church is now calling masturbation "self-abuse"!

Here's the reference: https://www.lds.org/ensign/2014/03/the-lords-standard-of-morality?lang=eng

Now, let me briefly explain something about the Ensign.  Anything with the Church logo on it:

THE CHURCH OF

JESUS CHRIST

OF LATTER-DAY SAINTS

is approved by the Church and it represents the Church.  The Ensign is one of the official adult magazines that the Church prints and distributes every month, and everything that is said in the magazine has gone through an editing process and has been approved by the leaders of the Church.  Therefore, the contents of the article I just linked are officially approved by the Church.

Back in March, I decided to read the March 2014 Ensign from cover to cover, to read it from an outsider's point of view (and the articles sure sound different when you read them that way).  When I got to this article, I was annoyed by what they were saying.  But then the short self-abuse section made me FURIOUS when I read it, because labeling masturbation as "self-abuse" does two things:

1. It greatly exaggerates the seriousness of masturbation
2. It greatly decreases the seriousness of the word "abuse"

Abuse, whether physical or emotional or mental or sexual, is a very serious thing and should not be taken lightly.  To apply the word abuse to something like masturbation is completely overboard and BEYOND ridiculous!  Masturbation is NOT on the same level as any kind of abuse!  I know what they're trying to do: they say masturbation is "tampering or playing with this sacred power of creation," and therefore it's a sin and it makes you unclean and impure, and they're trying to increase the effectiveness of their counsel against masturbating by labeling it as something more serious.  But calling it self-abuse is taking it way too far!

By the way, this relabeling tactic will only be effective in English-speaking countries.  I told Mc about what they wrote and he pointed out that "self-abuse" won't translate correctly into other languages.  In Spanish, for example, there is no word for "self".  The only possible translation would be "I have sex with me," and that made me laugh because that's not even close to a good translation.  Mc and I were curious to see how they translated that term into the Spanish-translated Liahona magazine, so I looked it up and they call it what it is: masturbation.  This is an example of how the Church is an American religion which gears its influence toward American members.

The overall feeling of the article is that there is an obsession with purity and what's "proper", and almost a paranoia of anything "impure"; the self-abuse thing is just one example.  Here are a few more examples.

Article says: "any conscious thoughts or voluntary actions that stimulate or result in the expression of the procreative power outside the marriage relationship are disapproved by the Lord."
Translation: "Don't allow yourself to get turned on by anything other than your spouse."

Article says: "[Pornography] is a poisonous, venomous, unforgiving snake that will strike the moment you take your first look and will continue to strike with a full portion of venom with each look thereafter.  If you are afflicted with this malady, you need to do all within your power to overcome it."
Translation: "We are terrified of our own sexuality and so we have to shun it with all the energy we have inside of us, because we really don't know what else to do about it.  No one taught us how to handle this in a healthy way."
**side note: this is why the Church will never thrive in Japan.  Japan is a very sexually liberal country, and many sexual things that are considered "pornography" to other countries and to the Mormon religion are considered normal and even art in Japan.  Again, Mormonism is an American religion with traditional American values.**
(by the way, Japan has a lot of members on record because of heavy missionary efforts in the 1970's, but the majority of the country's members are inactive.  A friend of mine in college went on his mission to Japan in the late 1990's and he said he and the other missionaries spent nearly their entire mission trying to find and reactivate inactive members).

Article says: "Our dress affects not only our thoughts and actions but also the thoughts and actions of others.  Accordingly, Paul the Apostle counseled 'women [to] adorn themselves in modest apparel' (1 Timothy 2:9).  The dress of a woman has a powerful impact on the minds and passions of men.  If it is too low or too high or too tight, it may prompt improper thoughts, even in the mind of a young man who is striving to be pure.  Men and women can look sharp and be fashionable, yet they can also be modest.  Women particularly can dress modestly and in the process contribute to their own self-respect and to the moral purity of men.  In the end, most women get the type of man they dress for."
Translation: "Women are responsible for men's thoughts regarding sex.  If a man has sexual thoughts about a woman, it's her fault for how she's dressed.  Men would be more morally pure if it wasn't for women choosing to dress in a way that shows skin or curves.  Oh, and we'll throw in the 'self-respect' thing to make women okay with this."
By the way, that quote from the article was the entire contents of that "immodest dress" section.  I quoted the entire thing to show that it mentioned nothing about how men dress; it's all on the women.  They say nothing about how seeing a man with his shirt off can get a woman all hot and bothered... probably because these are men writing this, and how would they know what gets us turned on?  ;)  Heaven forbid they admit that women have sex drives, too!  It's easier for them to only focus on men's passions and desires and women's "responsibility" toward those things.

Article says: "If we so desire, we can drive out every evil thought and immediately replace it with an uplifting song or poem or scripture.  Just as darkness flees at the presence of light, so evil flees at the presence of good."
Translation: "Sexual thoughts and feelings are inherently evil.  They somehow miraculously turn good only if they are thoughts of or feelings inspired by your spouse.  Anything else is evil."

I can't stand the Church's drive to control sexuality, I really can't.  I always felt that control when I was growing up, but at the time I didn't recognize it for what it was.  After breaking free of the Church's controlling influence and seeing that control for what it is, I realize just how prevalent and unhealthy it is.  I feel awful for those members who, like I did, are going through depression because they just can't seem to control these "evil" thoughts and feelings that they get.  This unhealthy obsession with suppressing and denying sexuality is one of the reasons why I will never return to the Church.

If you haven't read this article yet (I linked it in one of my previous posts) I highly recommend you do so.  http://bycommonconsent.com/2013/06/18/men-sex-and-modesty/  It's a Mormon male's insightful point of view regarding the sex and modesty issue that the Church has taken up, and it'll help put this Ensign article into perspective.

There were other tidbits of "encouragement" in this March issue, like when Dieter F. Uchtdorf said, "please, first doubt your doubts before you doubt your faith," but I'll save my comments on that for another post.